Top ten reasons you should hook up during an epic snowstorm
You never know when it’s coming… But it could be soon. And for that reason, you need to get your strategy together:
1) You’re probably freshly showered up, since if you’re like us — you heard storm warnings and headed out to buy a cart of liquor, beer and tuna fish.
2) Dating standards go flying out the window when candy bars become meals. You, my friend, could find your self in a dalliance with an 8, while having only weeks prior been a self-admitted 6.5
3) Potentially the internet could be down — Say goodbye to Facebook stalking, online dating site and porn. You’re going to have to participate for a few days.
4) In trying to save your tuna rations, your carb face from the weekend’s partying has really slimmed out.
5) What happens in a natural disaster…Stays in a natural disaster
6) If the world does end, you will need to form a mini army. Hopefully the person you’re looking to hook up with is a viable skilled potential member. If not, hey you’re also going to need peeps to hold the pots and pans while you march from village to village.
7) If stores are closed for weeks, this might be the last tube of chapstick in your pocket that you’ll have for awhile. That means your lips will soon start dissolving, unable to hold themselves together without beeswax and red dye 14353. This could be your last kiss–make it count.
8) Did we mention that the Internet is down?
9) It is finally time to stop being distracted by potential dehydration. No one’s going to run out of water. But like closing time at the bar, you know what’s going to run out? Lovin’. Now, get your game face on and go put your claims on someone.
10) Because you did not put on those sexy giant boots for just nobody! So strip it all off, but don’t be ridiculous-keep on the sports socks. You’ll need to stay prepared.